Sweet! Invasion of Gumdrops!

It is the year 2030.  There are no more sweets on earth.  No more junk food of any kind.  Sugar has been depleted.  There is no longer any sugar anywhere on earth.  Everybody is forced to eat only fruits and vegetables since all the animals have died out. This causes everybody to lose their skin color - they are now paler than pale.  They are more like gray.  People speak in monotones.  They are going through the motions of daily life, but, without junk food nobody lives for long in this day and age.

        More and more people inhabit other planets at this point in time.  That is why planet earth has such a small population.  There are little colonies on other planets now with the exception of the sun.  There are, however, no aliens on the other planets as we had come to expect.

        One day, all of a sudden, out of nowhere comes a spaceship.  Oh, it has the usual, blinking, blinking, blinking lights of a UFO.  You can even see it before it reaches earth. People are thinking it is a meteor rock, not an UFO, because that’s so 1950s.  They are about ready to run for the hills when it finally lands and, much to their immense surprise, they discover that it is just a harmless lil ole spaceship!  A spaceship made not of stainless steel but of gumdrops!

        A space Martian or in this case, Sweetian disembarks the ship.  While Martians come from Mars, Sweetians come from planet Sweet.  Everybody has gathered around the ship, eyes agog.  The Sweetian looks half human-half Martian.  He has glowing immaculate skin and bright, shiny hair.

        “Look. We come in peace,” the Sweetian said.  “My people and I have space junk food galore.”

        A girl steps forward.  Her name is Geo.  She has pale, grayish skin and the most dullish, dirty auburn hair you would have ever seen this side of the universe.  She also has the worse skin complexion ever.  She has never seen candy or any sort of junk food before in her life, but, she had heard the stories that were passed down in her family.

        Geo bravely stepped forward and asked, “Who are you?”

The Sweetian answered, “We are the Sweetians. My name is Pete. We come in peace bearing junk food.”

Geo points to the gumdrops that decorate the ship and said, “Is that junk food?”

        “Yes, little one,” Pete replied.

        “May I, I mean, May we have some?” Geo asked.

        “No, dear.” Pete said. “Those are a part of our ship. But you can invite some of your friends in for some junk food.”

        Geo decides to choose her very best friend, Mac, for the invite.  Mac has pale dark hair that looks almost grey and pale almost translucent skin.  Always the skeptic, Mac asks Geo, “Is this for real? I thought junk food was a myth that our parents came up with. What if they abduct us like in Hansel and Gretel? Huh? What then?”

        “Settle yourself down, Mac.” Geo said. “Junk food is for real. The Sweetians are just like us, only 10 times better-looking. And they won’t abduct us like in Hansel and Gretel. Trust me.”

       “Well, if you’re sure,” Mac said reluctantly.

        “Climb on aboard, you two,” said Pete.

        Before I go on with the story, let me give you a little background on the two young teenaged girls, Geo and Mac.  Geo and Mac, have been inseparable ever since they were kids because they were the only children in their families.  They are more like sisters than best friends.  Oh, they fight just like sisters do, but they still get along fairly well.  Mac is the skeptic; while Geo encourages Mac to try new things, to be an adventuress by being more adventurous. (Sorry I digress.)

        When they reach the top of the stairs, the door of the spaceship goes up, and, disappears.  They look around and see that the spaceship is full of junk food galore, just like the Sweetian said!  It is filled wall-to-wall with junk food.  There are shelves after shelves displaying junk food. And what isn’t displayed, is being cooked in the little kitchen.  There is a short-order cook with many waitresses waiting on people hand and foot.  It is a mini-café named the Junk Food Haven. Its slogan is Junk Food Galore! Enjoy A Sweeter Slice of Life!  At first, they are intimidated.

        “C’mon,” Pete encouraged, “Dig in!”

        “But what is this?” asked Mac.

        “Good food,” said Pete. “Better than the gross food you eat down on earth. Go ahead and try it!”

        “Wellll, OK!” Geo said, eagerly picking up a chocolate cupcake with sprinkles. “I’ll try it.”  After she tastes it, she is suddenly filled with richness, and she finds herself wanting more and more and more!!!  She can’t resist it!  Resistance is futile!  “Try it! It is so good!” she encouraged Mac.

        “Uh, sure,” Mac said, picking up a white powdered donut. “But is this stuff safe?”

        “Sure it is,” Pete said. “Less talking, more eating, girls.”

        “Okay, if you’re sure,” said Mac reluctantly, gingerly taking a small bite out of the donut. “Oh, my god! This is so good! I want more!”

        “Take it! At your pleasure, my dears!” exclaimed Pete.

        Ever the skeptic, halfway through a custard, Mac asked Pete, “Hey, man!” 

        Pete came over. “Yo, wazzup?”

        “What’s the catch?” Mac asked. “There must be a catch somewhere.”

        “Oh, well,” said Pete. “The catch, hm, is you get to visit our planet.”

        “What planet is that?” Mac asked.

        “The planet Sweets,” came the answer.

        “What do they have there?” asked Mac.

        “Sweets,” Pete replied. “all kinds of sweets.  This is just the icing on the cake, no pun intended.  For now, order whatever you want.  Get whatever you want.  It’s on the house.”       

        “Oh, my god.” exclaimed Mac. “Did you hear that? Everything’s free!”

        “You gotta try this!” exclaimed Geo, handing Mac a chocolate cookie. “This is unbelievable!”

        “It is so good,” agreed Mac after taking a bite and another and another until it is all gone.

        Mac and Geo decide to go up to the counter to get some different kinds of junk food.  When they saw the abundance of junk food there, they couldn’t make up their minds.  By the time they had made up their minds, they had arrived at the planet Sweets. While Geo decides on a banana split with all the toppings, Mac decides on a strawberry-banana smoothie.

        When they land, they saw an abundance of junk food everywhere!  Instead of fruits and vegetables growing on fields, trees and shrubs and maybe in a vine here and there, junk food is growing in its place.  Everywhere you turn, you see junk food.

        The people-oh the people!  They are indescribable, but let me just say this: they seem so happy and energetic and vibrant.  And the children-oh the children! They are running, screaming, dancing, and just being their happy young selves.  Capturing youth before age catches up with them.  Here no one but no one ages!  Why?  Because they live off junk food, and without junk food, they would all waste away.

        “What are those?” Geo asked Pete, pointing to the animals.

        “Those are where hamburgers and sirloin steaks come from.” Pete replied.

        “Yummy! I’ll never leave this place!” Geo said. “This place is so maddeningly wonderful!”

        “Straight up, girl!” Mac agreed. No way, no how will I ever go back to earth now that I have found Sweets.